The Babbling Bleating Old Man

These will be my final lines and I will not raise this issue here anymore.

I’m truly sorry for firstly, the misinformation of the ski trip, and secondly, the usage of mailing lists without permission. I want to have a few words on my abuse of the mailing list.

I will not deny the fact that I had abused the system - you can count that as entirely my fault. I have to admit that I was in despair to reach out to everyone but I did not have the means to do so. That was the reason why I sourced for means - then I encountered the webmail which I realize is the answer that I was looking for. I know it was unwise to use the contacts of an entity without informing but from the bottom of my heart - it slipped from my head and I never thought of the consequences. My vague assumption that all recipients were Malaysians had no valid grounds at all - and that’s why I admit that fact that I am faulty. Sincerely, it was unintentional.

But again, I didn’t know that I am not suppose to ultilize the list of addresses - furthermore, I am not speaking in behalf of any entity and it was merely my personal opinion. As I mentioned at the beginning of my article "..take it as a read-through, if you like." If the e-mail addresses are to be protected, it should had been forwarded on a BCC basis at the first place. It could be anyone else next in line who sells the addresses to spammers. However, I do admit it was my fault for unintentionally forwarding my entry to parties beyond the parameter, I will not push the blame to anyone. It’s my fault. Sorry.
In fact, I’m terribly sorry.

I am not directing my article to tell out who is the good or who is the bad or who is the ugly. In fact, I don’t bother. My dream is to see bridges unite that’s all. Nothing else matters to me. I just want to reach out to people, that’s all.

Maybe I am still dreaming. I miss my schooling days. We cared for one another, not just by saying routine "Hi(s)" or "Bye(s)". Anything that we organized - extra classes, co-curricular activities, official functions - we never forget to leave ample breaks in between to allow the Moslems to perform their prayers in the most comfortable time space possible, not a rushy one. We will never slot our activities on Friday afternoons as we know our Moslem friends have to perform an important prayer. When we were 15, we (Malays, Chinese, Indians) went to shop for Jeepas (An traditional Indian costume) and wore it for 3 Deepavalis (meaning 3 years) in a row. I’m still keeping that in my closet and we promised to wear it again during Deepavalis, if we do meet again.  During chinese new year, I had open houses for my friends. Due to the fact that my mom cooks pork in kitchen, I know I have to cater the Moslems in other means. Instead of non-halal chinese cuisines, I serve my Moslem friends with KFC and Pizza. You can never leave out cookies from your guests - especially during CNY. That was the reason I got my Moslem friends CNY cookies from Halal-certified bakeries even at a higher cost.

Maybe, that’s the main reason that keeps me believing and gave me the courage to post my entry. Now I guess you know the reason of me stating that there is no racism among us Malaysians, only the lack of chemistry - the poor process of understanding.

Sincerely speaking, I don’t want to gain anything out of this. I did this out of guilt. At 17, when I represented Malaysia to the United Nations, my friends from India, Pakistan, US, England, Australia, Israel, UAE asked me. 

"How will you define your country’s demography?"

I told them what happened among my schooling friends and I. Many were left in awe. Aditee, from India envied us for the fact that the caste is still widely practisely in many parts of India. Ava, from Pakistan envied us for the fact that in Pakistan, tribes had broken them apart. I don’t remember the name of this guy from Israel, but he envied us for the fact that we are allowed to celebrate (not worship) events gracefully without being a stigma.

If I’m to keep quiet, I will be lying to my friends, and myself. I have nothing to prove nor to gain. I just hope to see what I believe to come true. At least I’m trying. And I know it is possible because I experienced it.

Again. I’m sorry for the discomfort that I had caused. And I’m really sorry if I’m had interfered with parties who are indeed working hard to make things better. I’m truly sorry. Hurting people, is the worst feeling, that can ever lie inside me.

Alexander did not win the wars by himself. His army and Alexander did. We are the army and Alexander himself.

This is my final line on this issue.